Moments pass, l spend them contemplatively while shadows of the past flit across my future. Whichever way I look, there's history to it. Those histories can do things, they can leave their taste on the tongue many, many years after their moment is gone.
Desire, despair, desire, so many monsters....
With all I've learned, I surely should be good at this by now. But me, I'm on my own, as all things can be said to be; like the little flock of egrets on the landing bar above (which might not even be there if you're looking at a phone), life can freeze into a snapshot of experience that is non-existent, having been and gone save only the traces set upon it by the mind, the mind that files as it flies.
Retrocausality gives us room for manoeuvre in all those perspectives we hold so dear, but it doesn't change the circumstance we once were called to face. The future holding as much sway as the past only means that our doorway to it is less nebulous than one might think; 'feeling our way' into a future we might want means letting go of the history rope just enough to move forward. The next point of arrival will probably prove us right - the number of times I've been through a phase only to surmise that in order to reach the milestone I got to, that phase was necessary. Freedom or entrapment may be cast into doubt either way, for who are we to question the orchestration of planetary destiny?
Not to say we didn't have a hand in it collectively - a million species on the list of extinctions laid squarely at our door is nothing to be proud of. Yet still there are some who want nothing more than a head on a wall to be proud of, never mind their contribution to global desecration. We all have our own course to follow.
But hey, there's no fun in that - it's just a sobering situation we need to be aware of in laying claim to any sense of responsibility at all. The weight of these impacts on Earth is going to have a bearing on us - no getting away from being part of the planet. While doing our damndest to beat off negativity, we might find that the horrors being inflicted on the world are pushing waves at us with the power of the moon over tides, for we are living at a time when Apocalyptic change is imminent and it isn't sensible to assume we're going to bypass the effects, whoever we are and however much we think we've got.
Your life, my life, their lives all depend on energy for the way in which they're lived, the best energy being hard to find and positivity perpetually challenged by negativity's penchant for turning a perspective on a sixpence. The Now isn't holding a banner over your head to single you out in any way, it's here for you, for your eyes only, just as the synchronicities flitting across your timeline relate only to your thought track, nobody else's, and we still have no idea how synchronicity operates. Working with what we have, with what we know, there is space to consider our given time anew, and find appreciation of Now more often, whatever we happen to be doing with it. There's no-one keeping score on your positivity ticks. While you taste the difference, though, those you love will be glad of it too.
When the value we can place on the Now equals the value we place on the things we have, perhaps we can begin - that's an anagram for Being and I've only just noticed, in all my 56 years of being alive it's never occurred to me that Begin and Being share all their letters ...
- Perhaps we can begin being true to more than the sum of collectable parts.
Kathy is the author of Quantumology. She met up with quantum mechanics in 1997, pledging allegiance to its sources thereafter. These are her personal thoughts and testimonies.